We All Need a Friend

Nov. 6

Read: Titus 3:12-15

We All Need A Friend

“…do your best to come to me at Nicopolis, for I have decided to spend the winter there.” (v.2)

Whether it is Facetime, zoom, letters, texts, phone calls, or emails- no amount of technology can ever replace the power of a person's presence by your side. Real human contact. Being in the same room. “Kneecap to kneecap”. As much as Paul was using the technology of the day (letter writing) to stay connected to his “spiritual son” Titus, he knew it was a poor stand-in for actually being with him. I can “feel” in my bones his words to Titus at the end of this letter: “do your best to come to me.”

It is a vulnerable act to call out to someone like that. To realize that you miss a person, or just really want to spend some time with them. Sometimes we are not as bold or direct. Maybe we toss out a casual “we should hang out sometime”, which can often be overlooked. For some people, that is a cry for help… the best they can muster in the midst of their loneliness. Sometimes we become so busy that we don’t even realize how much we are missing those around us until one day a virtual tsunami of loneliness and sadness crashes over us… we miss our friends / family / community so much it hurts. “Do your best to come to me”!

Paul was heading into the “winter” in Nicopolis. The name of the city tells us it was a gentile city… a hellenized place… founded by Caesar to commemorate his “victories”. In short, it was not Paul’s home or even his familiar culture. We all know what it is like to enter into the winter of life and long for something familiar… something like home… the comforts of what we know and love. There are certain people we long to have alongside us when we are facing the cold “winters” of life… when we feel “far away from home” and in a place that is not familiar to us… where we feel like outsiders. For us - as Christians - this happens often. Why? Because the world as it is right now is not our “home”. We are “not of this world” (John 15:19, 18:36) When we are staring down the winters of life we desperately need to be there for one another… we need to “do our BEST to come”.

Paul knew that Titus was “busy”. Paul knew Titus had a “lot on his plate”. He was not ignorant of this or indifferent to it. This is why he was sending “Artemes or Tychicus” to him to carry weight while Titus was gone. This is Paul’s way of honoring Titus’ work while still not being afraid to ask for time… to tell him that he missed seeing him. I am sure Artemes and Tychicus were nice guys and all… but they simply would not cut it for Paul. Paul missed Titus. Paul was willing to send those guys to Titus so that he would be ample to come and spend time with him. Sometimes there are certain people in life that we cannot replace time with… there are relationships that God has given us that are so special and meaningful that there are no substitutes for them. Paul was not looking to hang out with any old person… he needed Titus specifically … enough so that he would send someone else away to allow Titus to come. This is a testament to the richness and meaningfulness of Christian friendship!

Are we willing to call out when we are in need? Could we be brave enough to say “do your best to come” to the person we know we need that the with? Are you heading into the proverbial “winter” of life, feeling far away from a sense of “home”? Who do you need to reach out to? Who is reaching out to YOU and are you willing to make the time? Are we seeking out each other in a way that still honors the hard work that the people of God are doing? Maybe you feel like you don’t have any friends like that. The journey begins with a special version of “do your best to come”: it starts by being willing to share with someone and say, “hey, I could really use a friend - do you want to be friends?”. Little kids seem to be able to do this way more easily than adults! For many of you reading this - I would call you friends like Titus! I am thankful that in the “winters” of life God has given us each other to lean into… to unashamedly say to one another “do you best to come” because I need your friendship right now and no amount of technology can replace you being here with me! Love you guys. - JDP